Wednesday, October 26, 2011

'Dwarf-Toss' Ban Could End

Florida Republican state lawmaker Ritch Workman, has introduced a "jobs bill" that would repeal a Florida ban on "dwarf-tossing." If the bill becomes law, it will allow Florida citizens to again competitively toss dwarfs in barrooms throughout the Sunshine State. Throwing dwarfs in Florida bars was first banned in 1989 because some democrats thought it was dangerous and dehumanizing. Most Republicans agree that dwarf-tossing is "offensive" and "stupid," but are willing to go along with the behavior under the mantra of "job creation." As a projectile in a 40 toss day, a smaller dwarf can earn up to $150. Workman says as long as the little people are protected by state approved safety suits, the new law will create jobs for dwarfs and midgets, "in a state where unemployment is 1.6 percentage points above the national average." Source, Bloomberg News

If dwarf-tossing catches on, what about Dwarf-Dancing... reality television featuring little people and the stars of the NBA?

Bastard - Definition

Entity formed by union of male sperm and female ovum in the back seat of a Chevrolet Impala because someone forgot to bring a rubber to the dance, i.e, my little cousin Wally's first born.